Fighting Breast Cancer
On December 5th, 2017, I had my yearly mammogram and was told I have breast cancer.
I don’t know where to begin. I haven’t had the words to write this blog post for months on end. Did you wonder where I went? I’m so sorry that I was gone for so long. My world came undone. It unravelled right before my eyes. Life can change in an instant.
I lost my ability to write for so very long. I couldn’t find a way to say the words out loud, let alone sharing it with my family and friends. And then the light bulb went off. How do I begin to talk about what it feels like to slowly watch your life start to crumble? How do I describe how cancer can chip away at everything around me. There are no words for that.
Having cancer is like getting constantly hit in the head with a ball. It has a way of de-evolving your life when you’re not looking. Cancer is like having a naggy little jerk in your head going, “Should I really be spending my time doing the things that I really don’t want to do?” It’s like taking a big twirly straw and sucking up your energy until you’re a California raisin. It’s a real eye opener. It’s scary shit.
Somehow, I just have to believe that the blog intentionally led me here. To help others. To help you and to help me. If cancer had a face, I’d punch it. This super (bleep) situation somehow kicks me into gear and exhilarates me to grab it by the scruff of the neck and shake it up. It challenges me to keep on keeping on. To write to you. To share it with you. Because I want to inspire people. "I want someone to look at me and say, because of you I didn't give up."
My strengths come right along side my vulnerabilities, and surely yours must too. Maybe, just maybe.. we can do this together. Just maybe we can all find a way through our painful situations with me leading the way.
That’s why I write.
That’s why I share.
That’s why I blog.
And when it hurts the most. We’ll just put one foot in front of the other. And fight... look for something positive in each day, even if some days you have to look a little harder. Be gentle with yourself, your doing the best you can.
Sunshines, I love you and I’m so grateful that you take the time to leave me happy notes in the comment section.
Your words grab my heart. Thank you.
Love, Debra
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